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by Mose Varty-Seppanen_Archive
I can vouch for Zoloft and Xanax. But I think the meds will get you into a state conducive to benefitting from councelling from a psychologist which I'd imagine would have more permanent results. Also I think It's clearly important that you experience a reasonably good first impression when dealing with a therapist or else in my experience it won't work out. Again, a healthy a diet is a must. Vitamin B complex can help with stress too.
I’ve also read about a non-prescription food supplement called 5-HTP that’s derived from a plant (griffonia seed?) extract.
It’s related to Tryptophan which got banned after a health scare around the time that Prozac was being approved. The manufacturing of 5-HTP is supposedly very safe and it’s claimed that the chemical works very much like an SSRI anti-depressant but with few side effects and less brain metabolism disruption.
Meditation has also been shown to help with depression but I've never quite managed to get the hang of it.
Warning : Longish, slightly dull, bummer-esque post follows. Feel free to stop reading here.
I’ve suffered from depression and social phobia for twenty years. My family background virtually dictated that I’d be pretty fucked up.
On my maternal grandfather's side of the family, all of my great aunts and uncles were in and out of hospital their whole lives with absolutely paralyzing attacks depression – like, they won’t get out of bed, won’t talk, eat, drink, wash etc . My mother and my uncle and aunt have all been hospitalized at least a couple of times with the same thing. My mother was post-natal depressed and refused to even go near me for the first eighteen or so months of my life. (Ahh).
My grandfather attempted suicide one morning by stabbing himself in the neck with a kitchen knife. He got unlucky and survived but with brain damage caused by the blood loss, essentially a self inflicted stroke. I believe he eventually died at least partially as a result of drug called (I think) chlorapromazine which was notorious for having a fine line between a safe and toxic dose. Lots of psych patients cardiac arrested on this drug during the ‘80s and early ‘90s.
My paternal grandmother was a war bride abandoned by a Canadian soldier in WW II and both my uncle and father have serious low self esteem issues. My father also has had a real problem with alcohol the whole time I’ve know him and that’s really messed me up and helped wreck my parents marriage. My uncle despite being a damn nice guy is a neurotic love shy recluse who never left home or married.
I’ve never been hospitalized for my depression but when the blues come I’m fucked. Everyday shit just feels like such a mammoth effort like wading thru quicksand. Thoughts about suicide (detailed plans) just completely occupy mind and I can’t think straight.
My social phobia is also just ridiculous. I once went to Christmas dinner with my girlfriend’s family. I walked in, said “Hi” to everyone and five minutes later I was climbing out of the window of a downstairs bedroom, fleeing in terror. My social phobia even extends to timidity about posting on this anonymous forum.
I been to a several analysts and couldn’t stand any of them. I went to a couple of psychiatrists who prescribed various cocktails of meds. I can’t remember most the names. Some made me feel mildly better and some made me shake uncontrollably, some gave me a hugely increased appetite even for food that I’d previously detested like crunching on chicken bones. None of them made me feel anywhere near what I imagine as “normal”. When one course of meds started messing with my liver, plus the med bills began to bite, I rather rashly just quit outright and then tried to muddle along as best I could. After couple of years of highs and lows and spiky mood graphs it all got a too much again.
I went to my GP this time and he prescribed Xanax and Zoloft. I’ve been taking them for several months now and these two drugs along with Melatonin to sort out my erratic sleeping patterns have made me feel distinctly better. Some days are better than others but in general I feel much more optimistic and motivated. The first few weeks on these meds made me feel almost bullet-proof. Without doubt this is the longest time I managed to feel better than OK for at least twenty years.
Unfortunately around this time, some bestially primitive Cypriot motherfucker poisoned a couple of my cats and another fucktard temporarily blinded another one with a shot gun blast. I felt so enraged and helpless that this overcame the effect of the meds for a short while.
Now I’ve sort of recovered from this trauma, I’m not depressed anymore but unfortunately my social phobia came back with a vengeance. I’m trying to work thru it slowly and the situation is improving but it’s still a problem so I’m looking into cognitive behavioral therapy.
Anyway, good luck.
MVS
