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eliya wrote:am i the only one who thinks that tattoos suck?

nope. i think they suck too.

Eierdiebe wrote:

eliya wrote:am i the only one who thinks that tattoos suck?

nope. i think they suck too.

that's cuz you guys are obviously pussies who are too scared to get a tattoo

H-GM wrote:

Minotaur029 wrote:Also, 50 bucks to the first black person/minority to post their tattoo. Haha. We're so Aryan...

I'm getting one on my dick that reads "KOSHER."

I'll post pics.

Make sure to post it in the "Let us see your...cock" thread I'm gonna make.

Is he kidding?

I kinda want a tattoo but I could never decide what to get. It has to be something you know you will never be embarrassed by in the future. How do you know what you will still like in five years? I certainly don't like the things I liked when I was 18, with a few exceptions.

Things I love, that I probably always will -

*My Cat
*Will Oldham
*Electrical Audio
*Nothing Else

now that's pretty fucking cool, it only shows up under black light

Marsupialized wrote:

now that's pretty fucking cool, it only shows up under black light

That ink can poison your blood and fucking kill you. That specialty ink is very dangerous.

Cool tattoo though. Scare the fucking shit out of folks at the rave.

Steve V. wrote:

Marsupialized wrote:

now that's pretty fucking cool, it only shows up under black light

That ink can poison your blood and fucking kill you

even cooler

Among many other tattoos, I have a cobweb in my armpit. I got it when I was 16. I was hanging around this ex-con who had spent the majority of his life in the penitentiary and would tattoo for cash when he was out. When I got my first tattoo from him I nervously asked, "So, like, what's, uh, like, the most like painful place you've ever given a tattoo and shit?"

He looked at me blankly and said, "My cellmate's cock."


Many of our conversations over the next few years went as such. One time, when giving me a tattoo on my waistline, some girl in the room said, much to my chagrin, "Ohmigod! What if he gets a hard-on?" Outlaw Bob (that's what we called him) replied, "I've fucked cuter kids than him."

(Everyone was silent for a while.)



After he told me about the dog buttfucking the cat tattoo on his cellmate's cock, I pressed for the second most painful place. He said the armpit. Being a glutton for punishment, I decided I would get my armpits tattooed. After a few more tattoos, I told Outlaw Bob I was ready for the armpit. He said "No, you're not."

I convinced him I was. I told him the idea and said I had the money. He said he would give me the cobweb for $100, but it would cost double if, at any point, I wanted to stop. Fine! I was ready.

He shaved my armpit with a straight razor (deadpan-voiced Outlaw Bob after putting a new razor in the handle and squirting my armpit with some soapy water: You're gonna wanna hold real still) and put the stencil on. After it dried he asked me if I was ready. "Fuck yea, I'm ready." I was 16. Nothing could stop me.

He made the first line. It hurt so fucking bad. I squirmed and winced and asked him to stop immediately.

Outlaw Bob said, "How much money do you have?"

All confused, pain shooting through my armpits to places I'd never felt before, I said, "a hundred bucks, why?"

He said, deadpan, "Not enough to make me stop," and held me down and continued on.

JESUS CHRIST. It was torture. This huge, 7-foot, Hell's Angel dude had me pinned down and refused to stop. I asked again and he said, "Awww, don't be a pussy."


The best part, halfway through he ran out of ink. So I put a sleeveless shirt on, and holding my arm straight up in the air, we went to the local stationary store. There were two old women working there, and I walked in behind Outlaw Bob (who either wore a shirt that said "SHOW ME YOUR TITS" or he wore no shirt at all, just a leather biker vest, which revealed the HUGE skull tattooed on his chest with the phrase "SOCIAL OUTCAST - FUCK THE WORLD" partially legible) walked in first, with me in tow. The old ladies looked at us with stunned amazement. I had ink smeared all over my half-tattooed armpit, with little bubbles of blood pulsing out. A grimace on my face, no doubt.

Bob was to the point, and ordered in penitentiary fashion, "I need three issues of India ink, mam."

We went back to my house and finished, with Outlaw Bob calling me a 'pussy' every few minutes.

It hurt. To this day I've still got just one armpit done. Maybe later.



Outlaw Bob violated his parole and fled California. I've only seen him once since then. Last I heard he was either selling Amyway or training professional wrestlers.

He was a fun guy.

tommydski wrote:Things I love, that I probably always will -

*My Cat
*Will Oldham
*Electrical Audio
*Nothing Else

Sounds to me like you're set for an enormous electron e on your back, Tommydski. You can show your appreciation for Cat and Will Oldham by growing whiskers and a beard, respectively, at no cost to you.

tommydski wrote:I kinda want a tattoo but I could never decide what to get. It has to be something you know you will never be embarrassed by in the future. How do you know what you will still like in five years? I certainly don't like the things I liked when I was 18, with a few exceptions.

But don't you still like the fact that you liked those things when you were 18?