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Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Tue Nov 07, 2006 9:01 pm
by SchmutZ_Archive
Did Neanderthal tryst help human brains?

While this article does not prove my (unoriginal) theory, I think that modern day humans are descended from ancient astronauts that colonized the earth.
I think they came looking for minerals and gold. Being Astronauts and not Miners, they created a new race, splicing their alien DNA with Earth's original inhabitants, to do all the work. Ancient Egyptian and Sumerian texts are full of references to Gods being punished for screwing "the help". And it is a long and lonely journey from planet X to Earth. Maybe God was an ape fucker.
Furthermore, there are ancient references to all kinds of amazing technology. the Indians (of India, folks) have texts 1000's of years old describing flying machines called "Vimanas". There are even flight manuals. Check this out.
And why has gold historically been so precious? It was only within the last few centuries that we have (re?)discovered Au's scientific benefits, like its extremely high conductivity for example. Is it possible that we just forgot why it was so valuable, or that we just could not comprehend?

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 3:55 am
by that damned fly_Archive
maybe time as earth knows it is a circle of death and rebirth. we build ourselves high enough to knock ourselves back down again.

or maybe those commercials late at night for "recycling your gold" are our ancient astronaut/miner ancestry just reaping the harvest.

and also, who's to say that the ideas discussed in 1984, brave new world, and the matrix didn't already happen?

maybe it's pointless to ponder such things because no one man can do a goddamned thing about any of it.

even if we do get an ounce of knowledge as to who we are, where we came from, where are we going, how the hell is that going to change anything already happening anyway?






oh, and i was once in a band called AuAu.

we were often described as precious.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 9:04 am
by gnangle_Archive
Aside from Carl Sagan announcing that VonDaniken was full of shit, and as pretty as the thought may be that we are a part of something larger. The ancient astronaut theory is shoddy, unsubstantiated, crystal worshipping, dolphin dogding , bullcrap.

the quest for minerals in the soil and crust of the planet has driven our world because cavemen like shiny , pretty things to look at. that is it, its shiny. we are just easily amused.Trapped in the meat prison, we find much to preoccupy our minds from the situation at hand.We are bored, naked monkey squirrels in a vaccuum,floating on a ball of dirt in the cold.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 9:07 am
by gnangle_Archive
Image

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 10:37 am
by wiggins_Archive
Dudes:

Get lost in here for a while. For serious.

It's incredible. Changed my life.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:16 am
by johnnyshape_Archive
Rick Reuben wrote:Neo's passport from the 1999 film The Matrix. It expires on 9/11/01.
Image


The only conspiracy theory concerning The Matrix is exactly how so many people were wowed by such an astonishingly piss-poor, second-hand movie riven with dreadful acting and atrocious dialogue.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:17 am
by Antero_Archive
I think you guys actually got too kooky for Bob, if that's all he has to say.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:23 am
by johnnyshape_Archive
Rick Reuben wrote:Dream Theater record, released 9/11/01:
Image


Dude, the Statue of Liberty is still there.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:25 am
by AAAAAAAARGH_Archive
The first Strokes record came out on 9/11.

Ancient Astronauts and Neanderthal Fuckers

Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:27 am
by johnnyshape_Archive
AAAAAAAARGH wrote:The first Strokes record came out on 9/11.


Truly the devil walked among us that day.