Top tips - I just love 'em. Everyone has one. Share the wealth of knowledge! It's small pieces of wisdom that I seek. No matter how seemingly useless. All that "you can clean an oven with olive oil and lemon juice" type stuff. Awesome.

Mine, I discovered in a flash of inspiration. If someone writes on a whiteboard in permanent marker pen, fear not! Simply scribble over the permanent marker with a proper whiteboard pen, and then wipe clean effortlessly. So satisfying.

Yours? Share the wealth of knowledge!

TIP: When trying to get a lot of things done, do not start posting on the Electrical Audio forum.

Need a handy disguise to help get you out of the country? Simply dip your face in some golden syrup and follow with a light dusting of iron filings. You now have a simple and effective (robot) beard.


*This tip is also good for getting into (gay) clubs if you're underage.

You got that from Viz top tips.

simmo wrote:You got that from Viz top tips.

Oh fuck. I've absorbed that unknowingly.

Fuck. Now I really look like a twat.

Okay then, another one - one for people with excessively sweaty armpits. Strap a couple of sanitary pads to your underarms in the morning and your embarrassing damp patches become a thing of the past!

Do away with foggy mirrors by smearing a bit of hard soap on them before bathing. It sometimes works with liquid soap but it's a bit messy. Better to utilize that as a masturbation aid.

MrFood wrote:Trying to get unsightly little lumps of Blu-tack off your walls? Don't pick them off - just get a bigger lump of Blu-tack and roll it over the area. Comes right off.

Same with messy gum patches left behind by gaffa tape. Just place a bit of fresh gaffa tape over the mess and rip it off quick. Mess be gone.

I too am a fan of this method.

Mr Food is Mr Top Tip!

Kepp 'em coming

Trouble with pickpockets? Try placing two freshly toasted pop tarts, one in each pocket. Any potential thief trying to get your wallet will instead receive a nasty jam burn.

simmo wrote:Trouble with pickpockets? Try placing two freshly toasted pop tarts, one in each pocket. Any potential thief trying to get your wallet will instead receive a nasty jam burn.

This is a great tip. Pop tarts are deadly weapons in the wrong hands.

On a serious note though, I remember some security expert advising people to carry fake wallets with foreign notes that appear to be of a high denomination (but aren't because the country they're from is shit), and expired credit cards to fool potential muggers. You carry your real wallet somewhere less obvious and hand over the duff one to satiate your robber's mug-lust.

MrFood wrote:
Same with messy gum patches left behind by gaffa tape. Just place a bit of fresh gaffa tape over the mess and rip it off quick. Mess be gone.

If this works, I'll have sex with you. Honestly. Every piece of gear I own is covered in gaffa tape leftover gum. This could be a revelation for me, I'm going to try it...