Please excuse the reposting, but ever since I saw this ad on Craigslist I can never think of "release" the same way again.

hot tub group release (berkeley)

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Reply to: pers-116894823@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-12-08, 10:51PM PST


Let's keep this simple. I have a hot tub on Euclid. I am having a group release party on December 28th. Everybody is welcome (last time was all men which was fun but I would really like to get some women this time). Here's how it works:
Five people get into my 400 gallon redwood hot tub. The temperature is a challenging 125 degrees. After a few minutes, everybody "evacuates." (voids their bowels in the tub). We see what "floats to the surface." This "letting go" stage is followed by a "coming together" stage in which each person helps the person to their left reach satisfaction (handsex). Simple and wonderful.

Some ground rules:
1)No footwear of any kind in the tub! Leave your flip flops on the deck!
2)Do not go into the house.
3)Scents are okay but please, NO GREASY HAIR PRODUCTS.
4)Please refrain from smoking.
5)Once everybody is in the tub, its silent time. No talking until everybody is out.
6)If you do not like what is "going down" (or coming up) step out of the tub. You do not need to make it everybody elses problem.
7)Please commit before showing up. Don't come out to the backyard, check out the "scene" and then decide to leave. This disrupts the experience for everybody.
Please no laughing or frivolity. Its not that it has to be "dead serious" but we don't want it to turn into a joke. For many people a group release party is a vulnerable psychosexual experience and your laughter can be shaming.
9)PLEASE NO LOUD TALKING AFTER THE SESSION. MY NEIGHBORS HAVE COMPLAINED SEVERAL TIMES AND HAVE THREATENED TO CALL THE POLICE.
10) If you are over two hundred pounds it is fine, but please let me know in advance.
11)PLEASE NO DIABETICS, PREGNANT WOMEN OR PEOPLE WITH HEALTH CONDITIONS WHICH MAY BE AFFECTED BY A LONG AND UNUSUALLY HIGH TEMPERATURE HOT TUB SITUATION.
12)NO DRUGS OF ANY KIND!!!!
13)Please make sure that you have eaten well and NOT EXCRETED FOR AT LEAST TWELVE HOURS before coming.
14)No food in the hot tub or on the deck. If you must eat, finish your food in your car.
15)You can park directly out front or along the street. PLEASE DO NOT PARK IN THE DRIVEWAY. If parking is limited park on POPLAR st.
16)Do not turn on the airration jets under any circumstances. This makes the party impossible to clean up afterwards and also disrupts the atmosphere in the tub.
17)Please show up on time for the session. The orientation period is extremely important and helps to insure that the party will be a success for all participants.
18)NO CAMERAS OF ANY KIND INCLUDING CAMERA PHONES. For many, the session is a "discreet" experience and respect for individual privacy concerns is of utmost importance.
19)If you have a health concern which you believe may be transmittable through personal waste material please wait for at least two weeks after the matter has cleared up before attending a session.
20)You are welcome to bring a friend PROVIDED I KNOW IN ADVANCE. Please do not show up with an extra participant.
Thank you for your interest and contact me if you wish to participate.

Please no laughing or frivolity. Its not that it has to be "dead serious" but we don't want it to turn into a joke. For many people a group release party is a vulnerable psychosexual experience and your laughter can be shaming.

H-GM wrote:12)NO DRUGS OF ANY KIND!!!!

No laxatives?
That seems weird...

some dude on Euclid wrote:hot tub group release (berkeley)

I seriously wonder if this is my girlfriend's former neighbor. I guess there was a very popular hot tub dude across the street from her, when she lived there. Although, I don't know if this sort of thing would actually make a person popular. Anyway, I'll ask her right now.

(Edited to answer my own question)

Anonymous wrote:Holy smokes. No, wrong street. I can't remember what the name of my street was, but that's not it. And the rule across the street from me was strict: every male had to be accompanied by a female.

that same dude on Euclid wrote: After a few minutes, everybody "evacuates." (voids their bowels in the tub). We see what "floats to the surface."

CRAP

POPOZAO!

HEPATITIS!

Also, many Shellac song titles work well. I know someone already did My Black Ass..


THE END OF RADIO!

MAMA GINA!!

BE PREPARED!

DazeyDiver wrote:Also, many Shellac song titles work well.
BE PREPARED![/size]

Or, to be fair, Tom Lehrer titles--choice samples highlighted:

1. Introduction (3:27)
2. I Wanna Go Back to Dixie (2:56)
3. The Wild West is Where I Want to Be (2:31)
5. Fight Fiercely, Harvard (2:41)
6. Lobachevsky (4:19)
10. When You are Old and Grey (2:27)
11. The Wiener Schnitzel Waltz (2:21)
13. Be Prepared (2:39)

1. Poisoning Pigeons in the Park (2:38 )
2. Bright College Days (3:03)
3. A Christmas Carol (2:54)
4. The Elements (2:16)
5. Oedipus Rex (3:41)
6. In Old Mexico (6:26)
7. Clementine (4:40)
8. It Makes A Fellow Proud to be a Soldier (4:50)
9. She's My Girl (2:53)
10. The Masochism Tango (3:30 )
11. We Will All Go Together When We Go (5:32)

1. National Brotherhood Week (2:35)
2. MLF Lullaby (2:25)
3. George Murphy (2:08 )
4. The Folk Song Army (2:12)
5. Smut (3:15)
6. Send the Marines (1:46)
7. Pollution (2:17)
8. So Long, Mom (2:23)
9. Whatever Became of Hubert? (2:13)
10. New Math (4:28 )
11. Who's Next? (2:00 )
12. Alma (5:27)
13. Wernher Von Braun (1:46)
14. The Vatican Rag (2:14)

Boston (1944)
I Got it From Agnes (1953)
Physical Revue (1964)
There's a Delta for Every Epsilon (1974)
That's Mathematics (1993)
Everybody Eat (?)
Thanksgiving (?)
Selling Out (?)

Fire in the hole!

or


nuttin', honey!