Maurice wrote: Tue Aug 20, 2024 8:40 pm

Dave N. wrote: Tue Aug 20, 2024 1:59 pm 1. It’s weird to learn you have a half-brother who was conceived the year your parents got married, and find out about it when you are 51 years old.
2. It’s weird to withhold that information from your mother because she holds your recently deceased father in high regard and would likely be devastated.
3. It’s weird for this information to start showing up on Ancestry and have your sister find out about it that way.
4. It’s weird when your sister goes and visits the half-brother without telling you, and it’s weird for her to find out that he is an amalgam of you, your father, and your uncle.
5. It’s weird to find out that your half-brother, who has never met yourself or your father, is also a bass player like yourself and your father.
6. It’s weird when your half-brother dies of a brain aneurysm at age 54, during a full moon in August, only two years and three days older than yourself.
7. It’s weird to grieve for someone you’ve never met.
8. It’s weird to think that I, too, could die of a brain aneurysm way too early.

Oh jeez, Dave. That is a lot. My condolences, and best wishes for you and your sister as you work through all this.

Dave N. wrote: Tue Aug 20, 2024 1:59 pm 1. It’s weird to learn you have a half-brother who was conceived the year your parents got married, and find out about it when you are 51 years old.
2. It’s weird to withhold that information from your mother because she holds your recently deceased father in high regard and would likely be devastated.
3. It’s weird for this information to start showing up on Ancestry and have your sister find out about it that way.
4. It’s weird when your sister goes and visits the half-brother without telling you, and it’s weird for her to find out that he is an amalgam of you, your father, and your uncle.
5. It’s weird to find out that your half-brother, who has never met yourself or your father, is also a bass player like yourself and your father.
6. It’s weird when your half-brother dies of a brain aneurysm at age 54, during a full moon in August, only two years and three days older than yourself.
7. It’s weird to grieve for someone you’ve never met.
8. It’s weird to think that I, too, could die of a brain aneurysm way too early.

Lu Zwei wrote: Sat Aug 24, 2024 9:56 amThis has been one of the best weeks in the last 18 or so months of my life. Really needed this "win".

dontfeartheringo wrote: Sun Aug 25, 2024 11:21 pm Dave, I don't even know what to say. That's a fucking LOT to process all at once.


For the last year, I've had a very steady job. IT generalist stuff. State job, pension, benefits. I'm old enough to be looking down the road to retirement in just under ten years.

So, of course a band I really like, a very PRF friendly band, would ask me to come tour with them in a month, for a month, with the option to be the full time drummer for this band who regularly crosses oceans and shit. A band who's last album KILLS.

My wife is exactly the sort of person to say "You shouldn't quit your job. It's got a pension." and then call me ten minutes later, to say "I've thought about it, and I want to add: unless this is really important to you, in which case, I totally support you."

This has been a really stressful year as she has bounced back from her battle with cancer enough to realize that the kiddo really needs more help with middle school math and science than I can give her. She has really thrown herself into making sure that the kiddo's teachers know her name and don't overlook her just because she has some challenges in the classroom. It's taking a LOT of time away from things like "relaxing" and "doing anything else."

What a terrible time to have a dream come knocking on the door.

Much to consider.