Lu Zwei wrote: Sat Nov 15, 2025 4:37 am

Gramsci wrote: Fri Nov 14, 2025 7:42 am Sitting in a chemo room… this post made my day.

Shit, I hope it's a preventing type of chemo, rather than a corrective one.

I had a best friend band-mate and he moved to an another city with his GF, we had a similar relationship that FM trey speaks about. I guess love conquers all in the end.

Ah, no, maintenance immunotherapy post a highly successful Analogous Stem Cell Transplant in April 2024. I’m completely clear, but on an advanced medical trial getting sci fi drugs to keep it that way.

I am having a bit of a Rapeman situation over here in my band and I don't really know how to deal with it.

I never disliked a dude that I played music with in my life. This dude is a great musician, a well rounded dude, but he has a flare for the drama and conflict just for the conflict's purpose.

I don't know how to deal with that, but I really wanna finish this record as we're half way through it...

Lu Zwei wrote: Thu Feb 19, 2026 11:02 am a flare for the drama and conflict just for the conflict's purpose.

Don’t get me wrong, you’re a nice guy and I like you just fine, but…

You haven’t exactly steered away from stirring up shit here yourself!!

Maybe you need to go out drinking or, fuck it, boxing with said individual and just get through whatever is going on immediately so you can move on and finish the album. I’m guessing that not finishing the album will likely be your least-desirable outcome.

*I mean this genuinely and honestly. If you haven’t already tried it, taking an idiot band member out of the band environment and figuring what’s eating them might work.

jfv wrote: Thu Feb 19, 2026 11:57 am

Lu Zwei wrote: Thu Feb 19, 2026 11:02 am a flare for the drama and conflict just for the conflict's purpose.

Don’t get me wrong, you’re a nice guy and I like you just fine, but…

HE'S A MOUTH-BREATHER!

You're on point! Thank you!

I’d recommend developing a regular meditation practice to lessen your sense of “essence of dramatic guy” you are applying to your bandmate.

One thing I’ve been thinking about a lot lately was something from an Alan Watts lecture where he talks about stopping getting annoyed with people that don’t follow your internal set of “rules”.

I'm only interested in working with people I like, and with whom I have or can find enough musical common ground to make a band work.

I've been in the same band for twenty-five years, and the other founding member and I are still close friends. Our current drummer has been in the band for fifteen years and remains a close friend. Our current lineup has been together for roughly ten years, and it's the best iteration of the band in every respect. We've had a couple of other members come and go, and we're all still friends.

I've had to eject one person from the band twice, and I completely cut ties with them after the second time. I don't have time to fraternize with creeps.

Lu Zwei wrote: Thu Feb 19, 2026 11:02 am I am having a bit of a Rapeman situation over here in my band and I don't really know how to deal with it.

I never disliked a dude that I played music with in my life. This dude is a great musician, a well rounded dude, but he has a flare for the drama and conflict just for the conflict's purpose.

I don't know how to deal with that, but I really wanna finish this record as we're half way through it...

Look up "grey rocking" (no it's not old people playing in bands)