So.....

I go to this bar I have avoided for years even though it's right by home. I did not even know they did shows there. This shit hole is called "Treats". I was sitting in with a godspeedish/noise rock band and i was playing some old 70's synths I have. No one in the band has anything near a stack or amp with mega wattage. I was playing through two roland cubes so i could get some bong smoke stereo action going. Not a lot of wattage.

It was kind of loud, but not ear ringing loud.

I'm doing my best rick wakeman, when the bartender taps me and shows me this contraptoion in his hand. Its a decibull meter. WTF????

we are at about 106.

He says we cant go past 100.

So, since i guess i am all of sudden band leader, it's about to me to police everybody's amps. I tell em to turn down.

They do.

But you know how the godspeed crecendos go, it gets louder. And louder.

Next thing i know Tony Sopranos cousin the bar owner w/ the tattoo on his neck comes up to me with his meter and says "If it don't go below 100 then i'm kickin you off the FUCKIN' stage, ya hear me" (or some kind of threat involving FUCKIN').

So, I make it all simmer down into new age drone levels. At the end of the set, another crescendo is coming and i keep thinking Soprano is gonna come. Luckily we shoot our load before the volume kicks in.




to add insult to injury, i was talking to this girl (pc-woman) i sort of know and she says to me, out of the blue in context of our conversation, to bad you had to go and have a kid.

Um, no, it's not to bad.
















Whatever.

Once again, I am sorry you're exposed to females of this, um....caliber? Ilk?
No, that's not the right word.

OH! I know! SOCIOPATHY!

I met this guy when I went to Autolux on Saturday night. Of course, I was the postergirl for Knob Creek that evening, so my vision (judgement) was slightly blurred.

So I met this guy, right? Single dad, custody of his 8 year old daughter (almost the exact same age as mine), not too bad looking and really nice. I'm thinkin', "What the hell?" give it a go and see if it'll work out nicely. I've actually never met another single parent anywhere in my dateable age range, with custody of their child, who happens to be male (as this is my newly discovered preference).

Is it even 2 days later yet?

Right, so he called me on Sunday to talk about going to see EVERCLEAR together perhaps, and then called me last night and talked about the 2 new green shirts he bought last week to go with his new green and gold pumas, which he really went out on a limb buying because he doesn't own anything green, you know, and so all of a sudden he just found these 2 totally "sweet" green shirts blah blah blah....some bullshit about what the shirts look like....blah blah blah

BLAH

I'm in hell.

Why are they all so vacuous, idiotic, self-indulgent/obsessed, useless and downright stupid?

It seems like it'll be a cold day in hell before I ever find someone worthwhile, get laid again, and settle down, which is really all I want in the first place.

Is that so much to ask?

its quite a lot to ask in one go yes.

why not try one at a time.

or maybe even two

Wow. Yeah, that's a bad gig. And those are some bad dating stories. My sympathies.

rachael wrote:Right, so he called me on Sunday to talk about going to see EVERCLEAR together perhaps, and then called me last night and talked about the 2 new green shirts he bought last week to go with his new green and gold pumas, which he really went out on a limb buying because he doesn't own anything green, you know, and so all of a sudden he just found these 2 totally "sweet" green shirts blah blah blah....some bullshit about what the shirts look like....blah blah blah

Everclear and "sweet" green shirts aren't great subject matter for conversations, but they rank pretty low on my Offend-O-Meter.

The guy is probably more out of practice than you and nervous as hell. Maybe he's really cool. Or maybe he's just a total stroke. Who knows? You certainly don't.

So, Mom, here's the deal. I'll give you ten bucks if you go out with him and provide a detailed report of the date.

Bradley R. Weissenberger wrote:

rachael wrote:Right, so he called me on Sunday to talk about going to see EVERCLEAR together perhaps, and then called me last night and talked about the 2 new green shirts he bought last week to go with his new green and gold pumas, which he really went out on a limb buying because he doesn't own anything green, you know, and so all of a sudden he just found these 2 totally "sweet" green shirts blah blah blah....some bullshit about what the shirts look like....blah blah blah

Everclear and "sweet" green shirts aren't great subject matter for conversations, but they rank pretty low on my Offend-O-Meter.

The guy is probably more out of practice than you and nervous as hell. Maybe he's really cool. Or maybe he's just a total stroke. Who knows? You certainly don't.

So, Mom, here's the deal. I'll give you ten bucks if you go out with him and provide a detailed report of the date.

You sir, have a bet.

Dinner on Friday at some Brazillian joint.

We'll see...........

rachael wrote:You sir, have a bet.

Dinner on Friday at some Brazillian joint.

This is not a bet.

This is a gig.

so did you go to the everclear concert? i didn't even know they were still a band. kinda ironic that he asked you to an everclear concert considering that most of their songs are about growing up in a crappy environment raised by a single parent. good luck on the date!!

Bradley R. Weissenberger wrote:

rachael wrote:Right, so he called me on Sunday to talk about going to see EVERCLEAR together perhaps, and then called me last night and talked about the 2 new green shirts he bought last week to go with his new green and gold pumas, which he really went out on a limb buying because he doesn't own anything green, you know, and so all of a sudden he just found these 2 totally "sweet" green shirts blah blah blah....some bullshit about what the shirts look like....blah blah blah

Everclear and "sweet" green shirts aren't great subject matter for conversations, but they rank pretty low on my Offend-O-Meter.

The guy is probably more out of practice than you and nervous as hell.

Yeah. Some guy's have even started discussing the sharpness
of puppy teeth on the phone. And taken them to bookstores for
first dates.
Stroke? Felt like one.

Rog wrote:Yeah. Some guys have even started discussing the sharpness of puppy teeth on the phone. And taken them to bookstores for first dates. Stroke? Felt like one.

So, Rog, here's the deal. I'll give you ten bucks if you go out with that stroke and provide a detailed report of the date.

P.S. Great editing.